my lovely crutch

when I'm high, I feel so much more aware of myself than I typically do. I hear everything that I am doing much louder than it probably is, chewing a pringle, swallowing my vitamin water. I hear myself so loudly when I speak but even those close by can't hear what I'm saying. it feels like I'm shouting! sometimes I take trips on a tangent in my own mind & get lost where it takes me. "where was I going with this?" the thought process is a scenic landscape. I can talk about pain & it no longer feels like misery but like beauty, part of an epic battle taking place inside me & spilling out into the world. I just feel rational & I can actually see through the smoke. my head races but there's peace. home in a strange place.