blind.

I wear contacts. they're supposed to be disposed of biweekly, but I wear them until my eyes get irritated & simply replace the old with the new. I NEVER take them out otherwise. this is supposed to be really bad for your eyeball health, but I've done it for years. Last time I saw the optometrist, he said my vison has hardly deteriorated, that my eyes are really healthy, & was thus commended for "taking such good care" of my contacts. crazy, right?

the downside: sometimes when my eyes get irritated, either by makeup or old contacts, I can't even bear to have anything on/in my eyes... even blinking hurts! usually I wait a day with only one seeing, contact covered eye before I put both new ones in. I do this because my glasses are not cute & broken, besides. well! last night I had to remove my right contact due to irritation, & when I woke up today my I had to do the same for my left eye. so... I have been wearing my broken glasses all day at home, glasses with only one arm, so its really tricky trying to keep them on my face with the lenses in front of both eyes.

I'm not opposed to glasses. I used to be, but now I'm slightly more confident with my appearance & think I look kinda cute in them. alas, my glasses are one-armed! I want new ones, the kind with those thick frames that all the trendy ghetto bitches wear. I don't care, I like them.

I lost track of this post. the point is, my eyesight is terrible! wearing my contacts 24/7 has made me forget how little I can actually see without them. I have slight double vision when I try to look at things up close, which I dont remember ever happening before, & even huge letters are blurry or even unrecognizable from just a few feet away. it really sucks, really, really. even though the doctor said my eyes were doing well, I feel terrible because I know I will always have to wear glasses or contacts, & that eventually my god-given sight may turn into old-age-blindness. this is so depressing, I just want to be able to see. I think about world devastation & the chances of surviving in a world with no luxuries like disposable contacts & I am truly terrified. its silly, but these are the type of thoughs that run laps in my brain.

someone pay for my lazik surgery so I have a chance against the feral dogs.