Thursday, October 30, 2008

the usual revelation

i complain too much.

i need to grow the fuck up- give up my idealized views of the people that surround me, we are all human & humans hurt & deceive each other. i live in a fantasy world where you're all on a pedestal until your own flailing knocks you off. this isn't fair to anyone, even to myself. i would feel much less pained by all of this if i was a tad more realistic about the nature of humanity. on the flip side, ive been quick to give people the snip-snip & cut them out of my life. these days i have no tolerance for anything or anyone.

im terribly unhealthy, i have to start taking care of myself better so that i don't die of cancer. im trying to quit smoking cigarettes but its mainly because i can no longer afford them, but i guess i am better off.

they say things always get worse before they get better, so hopefully this is when they start getting better. i feel like the universe is testing my will.

"it's your duty to overcome what you inherit in life. am i going to be the master of my fate or its victim? i'm not going to be its victim... though ive felt victimized- A LOT."

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

chance and fate are words we use when we feel like we lack control. They exist, but we are capable of manipulating them in order to achieve something greater? or so I tell myself lol.

Anonymous said...

must byfao soon. . .